I thought I’d do something a little different and let you take a peek inside of me instead of talking about ads or funnels.
Want to know 21 things about me I’ve never shared online?
There are times when the online world just crushes me down and I hide from it and run from the word visibility. I think as humans, we all have the tendency to wear a mask and hide things that may seem strange, or we think may seem strange to others, but today, let’s talk about Lynneisms.
That’s a phrase coined by my husband circa 1999 when he made the realization that he was in love with a weirdo and just couldn’t look away. He tells me that I keep him on his toes while highly entertained and that he will never need another woman because he’s already married to at least 6 of them now. Bless his heart.
As I sit here to write this, I have a candle burning on my desk, Led Zeppelin playing through my speakers and have already this afternoon consumed more caffeine than should be allowed by law, so let’s forget about all of the things you expect from me and have a few laughs.
- I am a twin. Not only am I a twin but my brother and I were the last babies born in Dayton, Ohio in 1968, which means my birthday is New Year’s Eve. You’d think I would be all “partayyyy” on my birthday, but I’ve only actually been out on New Year’s Eve twice in my life. That’s the day I get the couch to myself and don’t have to cook, clean or answer questions.
- Which leads to this secret: I hate to wear pants. Working from home means you only see me from the waist up anyway, so from the waist down, it’s jammies. I have about 20 pairs of what I call “comfy pants” but let’s get real – they are just pajama bottoms. If you’re on a video call with me and my hair and makeup are done and I have a nice shirt on, know that underneath that dressed up chick is where the true comfort hides.
- Speaking of things I just can’t stand, I absolutely loathe eggs to the point of violence. Hear me out here, I’m not crazy but my husband boils eggs and walks around the house eating them and I swear the smell makes me want to turn green. I have literally mandated that he is NOT allowed to eat them in my office or bedroom because the smells just stays forever and I just can’t handle it. Maybe I’m afraid of them…
- I’m RH negative. Did you know that only 15% of the population are RH negative and that it was just discovered in the last 100 years? Yeah. The History Channel says I may have Martian DNA, no wonder I’m afraid of eggs. One brought Mork to Earth.
- Speaking of physical weirdness, I have an extra cervical rib. 1 in 500 have this condition so yeah, it’s weird. The funny thing is, I’ve been told my whole life that I should have been the boy and my brother should have been the girl based on our personalities. Since I gave birth to only daughters, is that rib the representation of my unique connection to Adam? I told you this would be weird.
- I have 3 daughters. Nothing weird there, except for the fact that 1 is a brunette, 1 is a blonde and 1 is a redhead and they were all born, unplanned, on a Friday. It seems my game of life should be called Game of Probability, huh?
- Speaking of probability, I was the first woman in Dayton, Ohio to take the MCSE (Microsoft Certified Systems Engineer) program. I hold another certification (MCTS: Microsoft Certified Technical Specialist) for MOSS Sharepoint as well. Certifications are just my thing and before my next birthday, I will take the Facebook™ Blueprint Certification exam. In IT, it’s all about the certifications and my degree just means that I know 4 programming languages and can design a flow chart, but I loved the marketing classes and it paved my path to where I am now. Once marketing went digital, I was hooked.
- I love Greek and Roman mythology. As a high school English major, I read Shakespeare, Dickens, you name it, but my true love was anything about the Gods and how every day questions were answered by a mystical tale of adventure. My love runs so deep that I was truly horrified and forever scarred by the remake of Clash of the Titans and I don’t think I’ll ever recover. Damn you Hollywood.
- My disdain for remakes has been with me since birth, I think. As a music lover, an aggressive reader and avid movie watcher, it pains me to see creativity just die. Why do we need movie franchises? The story is over. If you remake music, it makes me emotional and I feel like my heart is breaking. Weird? Think about Alien Ant Farm. I rest my case. Smooth Criminal was a classic and they just ruined the airwaves for me. Have all of the good ideas been taken?
- I read EVERYTHING but romance novels (shiver). Although I did read 50 Shades, just was just so I could understand what was making all of my friends so crazy. At the risk of losing my Woman Card, I’m going to be honest and tell you that those 3 books were time wasted that I shall never get back. There. I’m the odd woman out. I’ve also read the Bible, both the King James and Catholic canon. Apocryphal books? Read most of those too. I just want to know everything.
- I took dance classes until I was 14 years old. Tap, Jazz and Ballet. You wouldn’t tell my looking at me now, but I can bust a move. I loved to dance and used to drive my momma crazy tapping around the house or using the wall as a barre to stretch. Jazz? That was our version of Hip Hop back in the ’80s. I used to teach dance routines to my friend and we would put on shows for our parents. Those were the days…back before iPad and the internet when we chased fire flies and camped out in our back yards. Memories…
- My love of music is so real and deep, I married a musician. There was a show last year called Beat Shazam and that same friend I danced with called me up to play. I won every episode. I can name a song within the first 30 seconds of it playing, although I will not lie and feel I should say that that talent alludes me the older I get. It happens. My husband says I have a gift.
- Jimmy Page of Led Zeppelin got his sweat on me and I swore I would never bathe again. That lasted less than 24 hours but I went to see him when he was in a band called The Firm and was so close to the stage, he flung and I caught. Sounds gross, but if he had kissed me, I would have sworn never to wash my cheek again.
- I have been to over 150 concerts. Actually, that’s a slim estimate. In the last 35 years, I have tried to make every concert of every band, every time they play remotely close to me. I used to keep a box of ticket stubs and I should have created some kind of cool art from them. I am actually going to a concert this month and in October this year. I’ve slowed down but I can say that I’ve seen everyone live except for Ozzy and AC/DC and that was just because circumstances prevented me from making the concerts.
- I have owned 17 cars. So far. My next one will be a Cadillac Escalade. I drive a Cadillac SRX now, but my dream car would be the Escalade. Get this: I have never leased a vehicle, so it’s not because I get a new one every 2 years. I usually own multiple vehicles at a time. I own 3 right now. I just love cars. I love to ride around and listen to music. It makes me feel free. I used to commute 40 minutes each way a few days a week and 5 hours each way the others and I just love to drive and want to drive all the cars. All the cars. I love to go out and test drive vehicles, but my husband gets so nervous. I have set out with the intention of a test drive and brought home a new vehicle a couple of times…. sorry Dan. At least I pay every one of them off, my love.
- I used to move every year. I would get a 1 year lease somewhere and leave when it was up. In 1 apartment complex alone, I had 4 different apartments. I’ve owned 3 houses because I HAD to move. Now, I remodel and buy all new furniture and it keeps me happy for a little while. Someone once told me that I was trying to find home. My problem? I’ve found it too many times. With the houses and cars, I think it’s safe to say that I just crave change. I’m a free spirit that cannot be tamed by anything.
- When I was little, I used to live in California but came back to Ohio, although my family is from Tennessee. We came here from the mountains and whenever we leave, we always come back. Ohio has the most beautiful seasons and I love each of them, but I used to ask my momma why we left California. Why? Would my life be different? Would I say things like “Gag with me a spoon” or look different? I guess I will never know, but I dream about the ocean. It’s weird. When I see a movie that is obviously set in Cali, it feels so familiar to me and comforting. Is it possible to be remembering or missing home? Maybe that’s why I’ve moved so much. Tennessee is still my second home and so close, I doubt that’s what I’m missing.
- I used to think that I had magic powers. Now hear me out on this one. Our minds are more powerful than we realize and whenever I put my mind to something (or as my BFF will say “Whenever I get obsessed about something”) I achieve it. I can think of a movie or song and within 48 hours there it is. I can think of something I want and there it is. I seriously thought I was Samantha from Bewitched without the cute little nose. The only thing is, I could never get my house clean or change my appearance. I know now that when I set my intention, I work to get it but boy when I was younger, I thought I had power! All I needed (and never got) was a magic wand. Now I just meditate and receive.
- I don’t nap and never get more than 6 or so hours of sleep at night. My favorite bedtime? 9:30. Of course, that means that I am up at 3 am most days but I don’t appear online until 9am EST. I try to stay disciplined because I love what I do and would rather be working than doing just about anything else. Even as a child, I never slept. The longest I have gone without sleep is 39 hours and it wasn’t due to insomnia, I was just busy. I have a hard time keeping my mind quiet so I just go with it. The only time I really sleep is when my EBV (Epstein-Barr Virus) is active and I figure it is just my body telling me to slow the heck down. I don’t want to sleep. I don’t want to miss anything I guess.
- I cannot live without floating. In the tub, the pool or the tank. I just can’t. I heard that Oprah had a custom bathtub made from the form of her body and now I want one. Floating is the only time my mind shuts off and I’ve been floating in a deprivation tank for about 4 years and if I had the room, I would have my very own tank right here in my house. There just something about the serenity of nothingness that resets my body and mind. If you’ve never been to a spa to float, I cannot recommend it enough, truly.
- I can always tell when someone is telling a lie. I am for real on this one. Not through electronic communication but if you are looking at me and I can see your eyes, I can tell. My twin brother hated this about me when we were growing up because he couldn’t get away with anything. My momma would say “Is he lying?” and every single time he was. Now I have this gut clench that always sets off my radar. I can tell if you are an honest person when we meet. It’s weird and it’s annoying. Why do I care if the chick at the gas station is honest? Really? I have other things to worry about. I just feel it. I just KNOW. Unless you put me on the spot. I have friends who think it’s funny, but it’s not. My brain rebels and I shut down. I told you. Lynneisms.
Well, that’s 21 things you didn’t know about me, because it’s not something I share online. Follow me and maybe you’ll find out more 🙂
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